THE COMEDOWN

One week until I turn 26 and, according to what pop culture would have you believe, begin my slow slide into decay, and it’s hard not to be introspective. I found myself really sad this weekend, especially while I was partying, and even when I was “having fun”. Is it possible to be sad while you’re happy? My mind may be splintering.

I’m coming off what I should qualify as the best few weeks of my year. RIOT was a huge success, I got through my first Pride at my job, and new opportunities seems to be cropping up as often as I grow bored with older ones. But the little things keep getting to me.

I had some very good sex this week and also gained insight into some of my interpersonal relationships and learned things that I’m shocked took me so long to figure out. I’m not sure if I’ve been willfully blind or if some things have shifted recently, but I pride myself on being very self-aware, so it really tripped me up.

I started drinking again right before Pride and I’m really proud of myself for making it (almost) a month. My body needed time to heal from the serious strain I’d been putting it through and I think I gave it that. But I’m definitely leaning into the drinking hard at the moment. Not gonna lie and say it isn’t fun.

With my birthday coming up, maybe the best way to get how I’m feeling out is to talk about what I would like from 26:

  • I’d like to have more fulfilling sex with people I actually want to have sex with again. I’m not talking about a boyfriend, but I want lovers who I care about.
  • I’d like to use whatever “cache” I’ve built for myself in nightlife to start doing projects that can make me money and fulfill me creatively, without having to compromise my “ideals” for someone else’s bottom line.
  • I’d like to be healthier, whatever that means. I know what it means but you know what I mean.
  • I’d like to see my family more and not feel so far away from them.
  • I’d like to be a better queer and educate myself on our history, our struggle, all the ways that I’m too privileged to understand it and all the ways I can empower myself and my peers to make real change.
  • I’d like to make art that feels necessary.
  • I’d like to sleep for an entire 24 hours.
  • I’d like to sleep next to someone for an entire night without moving away from them.

On a happy note: I went to an all-night beach party with a bunch of queers this weekend and realized I’d never been to the beach with queers before. It was nice. I always feel very balanced by the sea and I was—while my feet wear in the ocean, at least.

Ying my yang, please.

Mark, 7/7/14

Can the Party Space Ever Be Truly Queer?

I think we are all in agreement at this point that marriage is not and can never be queer. Whether you take the feminist approach that the institution upholds gender roles or the anti-capitalist approach that its primary purpose is to ensure the production of new workers, it is safe to say that marriage stands no chance in the face of a queer critique. While marriage equality is very trendy right now, we are over here trying to come up with radical new ways to love, to exist, and to solve the problem that is 21st century post-capitalist American personhood. And we can all agree that state-sanctioned unions need to go.

But what about partying? Partying, or the party space, always purports to be a unifying, sometimes transcendental, experience, and we all seem to be okay with that. We party separately in our own communities, but appreciation for cheap beer and good drugs transcends all boundaries. On some level, I think it’s built into our understanding of what and who a modern day subject is.

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THE COMEDOWN

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Ow, my forehead is sunburnt. That’s what I get for not putting on sunscreen at a fetish street fair.

This week had some very high highs and some very low lows. 

Pro: The Culture Whore was invited to host Ladyfag's party Shade: Shame, which was honestly the craziest party I've been to in New York—not necessarily the best, though it was amazing, but definitely the hugest in scale. It was in an abandoned warehouse in Brooklyn that, thanks to the bridge you had to cross to get there, felt like it was in an entirely different city. The production was incredible and the whole night just felt like this validation of everything that is happening in Brooklyn right now. This is the place to be.

Pro: I got a very sleazy blowjob in the bushes behind a van outside Shade. I left shortly after before the night could take a turn.

Con: I was blue balled by a Mormon earlier this week. We’d met on Scruff and had made out in a bar bathroom, and when he insisted I buy him a drink before we had sex, I basically just responded “lol that’s not a thing.” He came over to my place and told me that, as a former Mormon, he was a bit behind when it came to sex. I thought everything was fine until, halfway through hooking up, he said he had to leave. And left.

Pro: I worked Folsom Street East yesterday for Next, which mostly meant that I stood out in the sun with my lovely friends who volunteered to help and flirted with men in leather as they went about their business. I saw some very sexy dudes and had a really fun Sunday.

Con: For an event that’s so aggressively sexual, FSE was actually rather tame. It was very inclusive and communal and welcoming, but not all that sexy. I saw one single ass lick. And I put sunblock basically everywhere but my face and now my forehead is really red and it hurts owww.

Pro: I got cornrows.

Con: I got cornrows.

Pro: RIOT is on Friday and I think it’s going to be the most major party we’ve done yet. I’ve been basically traumatized by Pride, but as of today my “official” Pride business for work is done and I can focus on what really matters.

Con: I can hear by boss sighing from his office as he edits my Pride listings. Ugh.

Mark, 6/23/14

EVERYDAY POPPERS WITH CHARLENE

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Queer experience is often an embarrassing game of catch-up. While most of us agree that our lives begin when we make the choice to live authentically, for a staggering number of us that moment comes after the muggle children of our species have their first kiss, go to prom with their sweetheart, and enter the playpen of sexual activity. At least, that was the case with me, when a few years ago I found myself a proverbial gay Neo, blinking weakly into the sun and unable to use my newfound powers, having skipped the homo sapiens’ lessons in favor of my big comfy closet.  The adventure is exciting, but the he-queer manual is several hundred pages thick and I’m stoned a lot, so there are several rocks left for me to turn. 

(Maro Hagopien)

One such lesson I was lucky to have recently learned at Psychic Spring when Demanda Dahling passed me a flask full of poppers with a nervous giggle. Overcoming the naughtiness one feels when inhaling with purpose, my head was instantly cleared, I bent over and touched the ground in six inch stilettos, let out a huge sigh, and I was in the mood to socialize.  What a perfect flask for a party with such a sexy vibe! Isis Vermouth, the fucked up Miss Frizzle that she is, then spilled the T that poppers had made my asshole instantly pliant enough to take an otherwise intimidating dick with no prep work. “It’s a bottom thing,” she said to me with a wink, and resolute circles of hot pink blush. 

Feeling debased in the familiar way I’d come to know upon cracking open the gay manual, I decided nonetheless to carry on in my exploration of my newfound hobby. To my surprise, I found Poppers are perfectly legal albeit hard to come by, and as far as a few minutes of googling led me, completely harmless to the body. Why then is everyone not on poppers all the time?  With that question in mind I set out to explore these 50 seconds of fun in different everyday situations, all for you dear reader. To minimize the variables in this experiment, I used RUSH brand poppers mopped [editorial note: stolen, you bitch] from Ryan Streit and one full inhale split evenly between both nostrils.  

STRETCHING BEFORE CARDIO

Heavenly. Intentional breathing allows for very intense stretching and tension melts like cheap birthday candles. The Popper Head Rush (PHR) can provide interesting moments of introspection and intimacy between spirit and body, especially when folding into oneself. Able to start my run clear-headed and optimistic. Incessant re-administration of poppers while stretching can be a nuisance, and does feel counterproductive toward the end of physical health. Makes stretching for a workout or bed very pleasurable.

BIKING

Very bad idea. A split second of Golden Ticket-like elation followed by total dissociation with the onset of PHR. The mind is unable to process ratios of speed and balance, and reaction time is slowed considerably, the panic of mortal peril apathetically trotting behind the brain’s perception of traffic and pedestrians. Good luck trying to get your brain to talk your body into pulling over safely, too. Expert harnessing of the mind allows for some prostate pleasure from your bicycle seat, but just don’t.

SHOWERING

Close your eyes and enjoy this one. Water against your neck and shoulders becomes like a massage even with poor water pressure. Take some deep breaths and feel sexy, as though standing beneath a tropical waterfall that cascades over your bronze coconut tits. Leaves your mind calm and galvanized, a conduit for the artistic inspiration and brainstorming breakthroughs that showers are famous for fostering.

WAITRESSING

Invokes immediate case of not giving a damn. Make sure you write everything down and try not to visit that hard-to-please table. As a matter of fact, stick to Europeans, because the PHR will distort the grammar of your waiter script at the least, if not render it unintelligible. Distinct odor in the service area lets your co-workers know you’re trying to get fucked up the ass even while you are selling Lasagna. 

GIVING SHOWS

Hard to disguise while onstage, and PHR makes dancing in heels difficult. Alternative is to perform a full-on Poppers moment AS your show, which personally seems like a rookie drag queen move, akin to pointing to one’s lips while lip synching or doing ziploc bag full of “coke”. Also, poppers could spill due to the uncanny reduced motor skills that come from performing. Best to stick to tried-and-true nectar of the Gods.

THE SUBWAY

Seems undeniably shady if not illegal to forcefully sniff from a small flask in public…but it does help pass the time, so fuck it. You should be good on the J or M, expect sideways glances from L train cunt nuggets. Use the time to practice sitting straight, as acute body awareness makes correct posture feel good! 

SHITTING

Feels like masturbating. Makes me want to sing. 

ON MUSHROOMS (3 GRAMS)

The PHR manifested as all of the objects in my field of vision bursting into flames. Introduced to new vantage of the muscular system with x-ray vision of sorts: saw/felt my bloody muscles moving around inside the tight boundaries of my skin. Time is slowed considerably. Highly uncomfortable. Less of a Beatles trip, more of a Huxley trip. Obviously this test is subject to several variables, but expect an intense disturbance in the psychedelic experience. Remember however, with poppers, mushrooms, and life, it’s only temporary. 

Charlene, 6/23/14

THE COMEDOWN

I didn’t do this last week because I was exhausted and busy and frankly, kind of over it. To be honest, I’m kind of over it still, but I’m stuck at work and need a “creative outlet” and I like attention, so…

It’s been a weird two weeks since I stopped drinking. It’s not that I was a heavy drinker before, but I drank when I was out, to have something in my hands, to use as social capitol, because everyone else is doing it, etc. But I also have to be at work every weekday and, after a few weeks of treating my body very badly, I fainted while waiting for the train one morning, threw up in a garbage can and woke up on the ground. I didn’t know that people actually fainted outside of Downton Abbey. I had a weird few minutes where I was still going to go to work, and then I saw my reflection in the train car window and high-tailed it back home to sleep all day. It was a little wake up call from my body/the universe. I do a lot, and I need to take care of myself if I’m going to keep doing it.

Not drinking in a nightlife context is weird. I’ve still been doing…other things, and still having fun even if I’m sober, but I definitely do feel separated, on a different level than the other people at a party. There have been a few times where I came close to getting a drink, and then I remember that I don’t want to feel extra scuzzy in the morning and suddenly, it’s not appealing anymore. The past few weeks have been stressful enough, dealing with Pride and hosting parties and getting ready for Riot. I want to have fun, but I want to be smart and safe and healthy too. Doesn’t mean I’m not going to party, though. As fucking if.

See you out there.

Mark, 5/16/2014

AIDS and Queer Cultural Memory

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Last Friday I ditched work and made my way to the East Village to peep La Mama Galleria’s Ephemera as Evidence (on view until June 29th) with a guy I’d been talking to on a nondescript iPhone app. The show raised a lot of questions for me.

Ephemera as Evidence aims to consider the role of ephemera in “the political life of HIV” (the curator’s words), meaning, I guess, our collective memory of HIV. That ephemera includes condom wrappers from the 80s, empty bottles of HIV medication, and zines and jackets from queer groups like Clit Club who were active during that time. But talking about our collective memory of HIV is interesting and strange, considering our generation of queers, (millennial queers?) don’t really have any memory of the HIV outbreak that devastated queer spaces in the 1980s and 1990s.

Today we are constantly told—with good intentions, I think—that those years are part of our cultural heritage, and I think that is partly behind all of the AIDS-crisis narratives that have been appearing recently. Take last summer’s AIDS in New York: The First 5 Years exhibition at the New York Historical Society, or the film version of “The Normal Heart” on HBO last month. It seems to be about educating our generation on what the queers that came before us went through, to help us understand our cultural standing today, but also to give us a history we can claim as ours. All of these also have a sort of “never forget” feel, so it’s not insignificant that free condoms were available in a bowl at La Mama’s front desk.

This exhibition was different than the NYHS one, balancing art made by queers today with more ordinary objects, or ephemera, like the 80s condom wrappers—apparently their packaging used to be totally different. Nostalgia seemed to be a general theme. The 26-year-old who I was there on a date with, who turned out to actually be 34, said that much of the ephemera on display made him feel nostalgic for the 90s. I didn’t feel nostalgic because I barely remember the 90s. I didn’t know what I was supposed to feel.

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I was approaching Ephemera like an archaeological exhibit at first—this is what things looked like back then, this is sort of what it might have felt like. But then I remembered that I was supposed to be experiencing it as part of my cultural history: thirty years ago, this pain could have been mine. But it would have been a different me, one who didn’t enter into queerness being warned to always wear a condom, get tested regularly, who didn’t enter into queerness through the already queer-friendly space of the internet. So to say that I can relate, or identify with this history on a personal level, feels superficial to me. In other words, the AIDS crisis is an important moment in history, but is it really my history? Or is queer culture today a different beast than the one scarred by AIDS 30 years ago? Today, post-AIDS crisis, we are searching for a communal identity as queer people, particularly queer men (who are usually the ones represented in these narratives), through looking back at this particular moment in history, asking who we are, knowing that this moment helped shape the way the world understands us today.

Is that really productive, considering that AIDS is still a problem for us today? I understand the usefulness of making this time in history a touchstone for community building among queer people, but I wonder if it isn’t also problematic to present the AIDS outbreak as a historical moment, meaning in the past, when many of our people are still suffering from it.

The AIDS crisis was a time when queers fought for and gained visibility, and so our generation owes them everything for that. But there’s still more to be done, including but not limited to solving the AIDS problem that still exists today. There’s also, you know, the gender binary, capitalism, etc. So if I got a singular take-home point from this exhibition, it’s not, look, this is part of MY history. It’s, look, this is what a community that we would later grow into and make our own recovered from, and that strength and resilience is what should be a touchstone for queer community building and activism today. That, as opposed to only focusing on past suffering. That’s my perspective, and someone who lived through the 80s and 90s will inevitably have a different one, but this exhibition as a whole invites multiple readings, and that’s what makes it worth checking out.

Also, don’t believe people when their profile says they are 26 before you see their driver’s license with DOB: 10/21/1980 on it. 

Charles Keiffer 6/11/14

THE WEEK - JUNE 9-15, 2014

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THE WEEK

A GUIDE FOR ARTSLUTS

Dear queers of Brooklyn and the undergound beyond… What you’re doing is cool and people are noticing. Keep being strange, sexy and spectacular. Love, Bjork 

YOUR WEEKLY MIX: DJ DANDYLION - LOW BLOOD SUGAR 


MONDAY 6/9
QUEER/ART/FILM @ IFC (323 6th Ave) The fabulous Barbra Herr presents a 35mm screening of Tennessee Williams’ Suddenly Last Summer starring Katherine Hepburn as a crazy aunt and a lobotomized Elizabeth Taylor. With themes of cannibalism and homosexuality, this film is a classic gothic beauty as only Tennessee Williams could do. 7:30PM, $14.
CAKES DA KILLA @ CAMEO GALLERY (93 N6th ST) Queer rapper Cakes Da Killa hosts a listening party of his new mixtape, Hunger Pangs. 8PM, FREE!
THE BATHSALTS BALL @ DON PEDRO (90 MANHATTAN AVE) We’re not sure how Bathsalts has made it two years without a murder, an overdose, property damage or arson of some kind, but stranger things have happened. Join Macy Rodman, Severely Mame and almost every fucking drag queen in Brooklyn at this night of celebration. We’ll be there presenting a very official Buzzfeed quiz, so you definitely don’t want to miss out. 9PM, FREE!
HOT FRUIT @ METROPOLITAN (559 LORIMER) Another incarnation of David John Sokolowski’s weekly party at Metropolitan, where, as always, we are promised performance art, dance, drag, and $2 PBR’s. At midnight Chris Tyler, Joe Castle Baker, and Mat Kastella take the stage to give us showz, and Econ and Sokolowski himself spin backed by Ethan Weinstock’s trippy video art. 10PM, FREE!

 

TUESDAY 6/10
BETTER OFF READ @ INVISIBLE DOG ART CENTER (51 BERGEN ST) Red Durkin hosts this reading celebrating trans women writers and their work with readings by over 20 up & coming trans women. 7PM, FREE!
STRUT @ ACME (9 GREAT JONES) Deryck Todd’s sexy new basement dance party is hosted by none other than our very own Mark Dommu, alongside Sophia Lamar and Gavin Grymes. Drop Mark’s name at the door and join us for a drink, a dance and a kiki. DJ Trey Latrash has the nasty beats. 10PM, FREE!
ON TOP @ LE BAIN (444 WEST 13TH) Last week felt like taking acid with John Waters, or going to a Manhattan Susan Bartsch party at Le Bain, or both. It was definitely at least one of those things. This Tuesday On Top returns, again with appearances from Michael Musto and Amanda Lepore and tracks spun by Jeremy Pelser. Just don’t stand in the elevator and whisper, “this is where Solange fought Jay Z,” because I think the security guards at The Standard are sick of hearing that. All I know is it ain’t summer til you’re on top. 11PM, FREE!

 

WEDNESDAY 6/11
THANKS FOR COMING @ TRIBECA GRAND (2 AVENUE OF THE AMERICAS) Michael Cohen and Ryan Roberts present a convergence of vernissage and voyeurism in a one-night exhibition featuring some of the city’s finest up and coming artists. Get ready for paintings, sculpture, performance and installation in the Tribeca Grand’s Foyer and Studios. Just pace yourselves with the free champagne girls. 8PM, FREE!
BIJOUX @ GOLDBAR (389 BROOME ST) Get into this opulent weekly rage, hosted by our founder, Mark Dommu, so drop his name at the door and get bougie. This week is extra ham thanks to new host, Culture Whore family member Will Sheridan, and tunes by the always incredible DJ Nita. 10PM, FREE!

 
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YOUR WEEKLY VIDEO - HERVE X ZEBRA KATZ’S “TEAR THE HOUSE UP”
 

THURSDAY 6/12
TOO MANY LENAS @ ARS NOVA (511 WEST 54 ST) A coven of six Lena Dunham’s are holed up in a Brooklyn loft, enacting the daily rituals of extreme millennial self-dramatization. As success weighs heavier and heavier on them, can the Lenas retain their individuality and avoid becoming the ultimate cliché? That is the question posed by the 3rd edition of show, created, conceived, and compiled by Carroll Simmons and featuring additional text by the actual Lena Dunham. 7PM, $15.
ALL IDENTITIES YOGA @ THE SPECTRUM (59 MONTROSE AVE) Everyone should be able to share in the joy of yoga and the benefits it offers, even if you’re not a white soccer mom who’s enthusiastic about spas, with the privilege of affording expensive classes. Thus, The Spectrum hosting a yoga class open to all identities, bodies, and abilities every Thursday (your instructor Oscar is, however, not certified in yoga for people of different abilities and the choice to participate is the responsibility of the student). The intention is an environment everyone can feel comfortable learning yoga in. 8:30PM, $10 SUGGESTED.
STARLITE THURSDAY @ FRIENDS AND LOVERS (641 CLASSON AVE) Machine Dazzle hosts the BK pride edition of this sexy party in the aptly named Crown Heights bar. Come see performances by Horrochata and Shirley House and bop to music by DJ Dandylion. 9PM, $5 IN ADVANCE, $8 AT THE DOOR.
SWIMWEAR/SPANDEX PARTY @ THE EAGLE (554 West 28th St) We are so pumped to have an excuse to venture out to the legendary leather bar where our talented designer friend Nick Stryker is setting up a rooftop popup shop with the latest from his limited edition spandex collection. Our own Paul Leopold is hosting alongside the fierce Travis Steele Sisk (Manifestiny Squirts) and they’ve assembled a jaw dropping group of hot ass muses to model the sensational psychedelic swimsuits including Geo Dell, Rify Royalty and Jack Jackson. Tear off your clothes and run up to the roof for this special sexy celebration. 10pm, FREE!

 

FRIDAY 6/13
PASSION OF KIM KARDASHIAN @ PALISADES (906 BROADWAY) Andrew Porteus presents an event of biblical proportions to celebrate Hannah Kunkle’s religious-themed graphic collages of Kim K, which will be on display. Also look forward to live music by Robot Moonjuice and DJ sets by JX Cannon, Blum, Neuport and Brian Whatever. Bring the fam cause this event is all ages, with an open bar from 9-9:30 which you’ll need cause you’ll be with the fam. 7PM, FREE BEFORE 9, $5 AFTER.
SLEEPING BEAUTY AND THE BEAST @ BROOKLYN ARTS EXCHANGE (421 5TH AVE) This Katy Pyle-directed production continues the work of Ballez, which wrestles with the reality of queer bodies within the heteronormative, elitist form of ballet. Friday-Sunday, trouble arises in Sleeping Beauty & The Beast when the daughter of a Lower East Side garment industry king falls for a lesbian fiber artist at her 16th birthday party. The Violet Faery puts everyone to sleep for 100 years so that the Princess can come out instead in 1993. 8PM, $15 GENERAL, $8 LOW INCOME.
DEEP TROUBLE @ BODY ACTUALIZED (143 TROUTMAN ST) Deep Trouble’s goal is simple but ephemeral: to create expansive late night contexts that break down the dogmatic tropes that keep dance parties segregated into identity and genre ghettos. Also to freak you out. That’s what you’ll get in this Friday turnup featuring special guest DJ Jacky Sommer alongside Deep Trouble’s resident DJs. FREE!

 

SATURDAY 6/14
TIKI DISCO ON THE ROOF @ OUTPUT (74 WYTHE AVE) Don’t get too full at brunch because this daytime dance party at Output will have you twirling into Sunday morning with tracks spun by Lloydski, Andy Pry and Eli Escobar. 2PM, $10 ON TICKETFLY.
B0DY H1GH AND SKIRT @ MACIE GRANSION (87 RIVINGTON) Celebrate the release of Brooklyn-based art duo B0DYH1GH’s Sophomore mythtape LILDED GILY, as they give us a special intimate set in the basement of the lovely Macie Granson, joined by special guest band Skirt. 7PM, FREE!
AZUCAR PAPI@ FRIENDS AND LOVERS (641 CLASSON AVE) Two major QTPOC parties, Azucar and Papi Juice come together to give you tropical cosmos at the dopest Brooklyn Pride afterparty. The queer Latin dance vibes will be brought by performers Maluca, Princess Nokia, and Zuzuka Poderosa and DJ sets by False Witness and Precolumbian. 11PM, $20
DIZZYLAND @ THE SPECTRUM (59 MONTROSE AVE) Host Trey La Trash brings Cher Noble, Chris of Hur, That’s So Raben and more out to Willy B for a very, very hot evening at The Spectrum. Get ready for showz, dancing, and disneyland on meth vibes. 10PM, $5 BEFORE MIDNIGHT, $10 AFTER

 

SUNDAY 6/15
HAIL DADDY @ DON PEDRO (90 MANHATTAN AVE) Brooklyn witches Severely Mame and our own Mark Dommu want you to celebrate Father’s Day with the man—well, archetypal demonic being—who has been a father to us all. Yes, get a card and a gift for the Father of Lies, but nothing from Sharper Image, please. Joining your hosts for Satanic shows are Macy Rodman, Boywolf, Chris Tyler and Charlene, with hellish beats by JX Cannon. 11PM, $3.


GET YOUR DISCOUNT TICKETS FOR OUR QUEER PRIDE FANTASY: RIOT!

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Photo Art by Patrick Arias

THE WEEK - JUNE 2-8, 2014


THE WEEK

A GUIDE FOR ARTSLUTS

Children are hungry for art and excess this summer as more and more events keep popping up around us, and don’t you worry we’re here to feed you babies. Seriously we’re listing more events this week than we ever have before. Its gonna be another big hot juicy one! Ready to bite?

Enjoy Timothy Allen’s “Tape 19” mix while you read!
 

MONDAY 6/2

HOT FRUIT @ METROPOLITAN (559 LORIMER ST) David John Sokolowski’s weekly party steals Monday night once again with performances by 3XS, GRAMMA, Nina Dri, and tracks spun by Econ and Sokolowski himself, all backed by birthday boy Ethan Weinstock’s video art. $2 PBR and $5 for PBR and a shot, but without the toilet flood that made last week so memorable, and made us all so wet. Wheelchair accessible, 10PM, FREE!

BATHSALTS @ DON PEDRO (90 MANHATTAN AVE) One week before this party’s two-year anniversary, celebrate all the misses with “The Absolute Worst of Bathsalts.” With all the terrible performers, performances, fights and rotten eggs thrown from the neighboring projects—it’s going to get ugly, ladies. 10PM, FREE!

TUESDAY 6/3

AMBER MARTIN @ JOE’S PUB (425 Lafayette St) In “The Days of My Lives,” celebrated NYC songstress and comedienne Amber Martin returns to take us on a journey through the places and faces, the memories and the music that shaped this young Southeast Texas woman’s life on her 30 year migration to the present. A multi-media, musical variety show with a vocal 4-track soundscape and guest appearances by Martin’s other beloved characters. 9PM, $15 (PLUS $12 FOOD/DRINK MINIMUM).

STRUT @ ACME (9 GREAT JONES) Deryck Todd’s sexy new basement dance party is hosted by none other than our very own Mark Dommu. Drop his name at the door and join him for a drink, a dance and a kiki. DJ David Sokolowski spins groovy tunes to make you move all night. 10PM, FREE!

ON TOP @ Le Bain (444 W 13th St) Susanne Bartsch’s weekly summer party reopens at The Standard Hotel with appearances by Amanda Lepore, Joey Arias and Michael Musto, DJ sets by Miss Guy, Amber Valentine and more, and a show featuring Ab Soto of “CRUNCHY” fame. Just try not to fall in the pool. 11PM, FREE!

THE HILLS HAVE QUEENS @ TANDEM (236 THROUTMAN ST) Locally Grown presents 5 shows inspired by the films of Wes Craven, hosted by Hamm Samwich and featuring Lady Simon, Rify Royalty, Steven James Zarzecki, Mystery Selavy and Di Ba. Think Scream, Freddy, People Under the Stairs, etc. Drink, dance, watch, scream, laugh, cry. 11:30PM, FREE!

 

WEDNESDAY 6/4

QUEER/ART/BROOKLYN @ THE WEST (379 UNION AVE) This bi-monthly queer social program welcomes three Brooklyn-based artists to engage in conversation and libation, discussing art across disciplines. Featuring painter Angela Dufesne, filmmaker Silas Howard, and photographer Paul Mpagi Sepuya. 8PM, FREE!

 

BIJOUX: TOOLS AND JEWELS @ GOLDBAR (389 BROOME ST) If you’ve never been inside Goldbar, you absolutely must check it out. The name does not lie: everything is gold, including golden skulls mounted ALL OVER the walls. Opulence is everything. The Culture Whore’s Mark Dommu hosts, so put on a LQQK and drop his name at the door, this kiki is real! This edition celebrates host Deryck Todd’s birthday with a special appearance by the one and only Thorgy Thor. 10PM, FREE!

WOAHMONE @ VON (3 BLEEKER ST) DJs Nath Ann Carrerra and Savannah Knoop cross streams with Ass Troll Projections for this magical queer dance party. Come see Savannah at her last Woahmone before she takes her Savannatical, alongside visuals by Droopy and laser installations by Peter Burr. 10PM, FREE!

THURSDAY 6/5

JUICYARTFEST @ THE WELL (270 MESEROLE) This three-day art festival thematizes street art, the urban landscape, and community, spurred by the queer agenda of breaking barriers, both internal and external. Featuring an art fair, live painting, collaborative exhibition & video projections as well as live music and performances, we are promised three days of dynamic art and music. Come see Don Rimx, Icy and Sot, Meca, and other international artists turn it out on the canvas while Perla Cozzone’s Group and Rabbi Darkside, among other DJs help us get down while we flex our cultural muscles. 2-10PM, $8 on ticketfly website, $10 at door, $20 three day pass.

EPHEMERA AS EVIDENCE @ LA MAMA GALLERIA (6 EAST 1ST ST) Thinking through the ephemeral as necessary to the political life of HIV, this exhibition acknowledges a larger history of silence and erasure while at the same time making salient strategies for survival and worldmaking potentials in the face of a violently phobic public sphere. Curators Joshua Lubin-Levy, of April’s Living Labor conference, and Ricardo Montez from The New School, present a diverse collection of works by artists such as Jack Waters & Peter Cramer, Vincent Chevalier, Michael Socum, and the iconic Clit Club. This should be an interesting counterpoint for those who saw last summer’s “AIDS in New York: The First Five Years” at the New York Historical Society. On view from June 5-29, opening reception 6-8PM. FREE!

STREEPSHOW @ ARS NOVA (511 WEST 54 ST) Nine Streeps. One house. Co-created by Greg Kozatek and Jay Stull, this reality show send-up follows nine Meryl Streep characters competing for the chance to rewrite their narrative. Watch what happens when these ladies stop being polite and start getting Meryl. 7PM, $15

THIS CHARMING CHICA @ DON PEDRO (90 MANHATTAN AVE) Were the Smiths queer? That is debatable, but their songs did influence and speak to many of us queers. Hence, DJ Shomi Noise is gonna help us celebrate them and their songs at Riot Chica, a queer/punk/riot grrrl party all about feminism, social justice, DIY Culture, and all that good shit. Come out, even if you haven’t got a stitch to wear. 8PM, $5

SHOWGASM @ ARS NOVA (511 WEST 54 ST) John Early and house DJ Hamm Samwich give us a raucous variety show with performances ranging from hilarious to titillating to utterly inappropriate. Come see Kate Berlant, Cocoon Central Dance Team, Kim Katzberg, fuckin’ Cher Noble, and The Shirtwaist Sisters incite us to spontaneous singing, dancing and/or unexpected climax. 9PM, $5

T.B.A. @ BIZARRE BUSHWICK (12 JEFFERSON ST) Six performers, one DJ, one stage… And they all plan on laying their hearts out on that stage. TO BE ANNOUNCED is whatever the spirit tells them to do and you will love it. Marie Cherry, Boy Georgia, Aja, Sparklez, Rify Royalty, and Charlene will be giving you live singing, drag performances, burlesque, boylesque, and so much more, while the music is TBA (get it?). 10PM, $5 suggested.

FRIDAY 6/6

F.:.NCY_BOOK_LEARNIN’_ @ BUREAU OF GENERAL SERVICES-QUEER DIVISION (83A HESTER ST) If you’ve been following the ignorant ass conversations in your community via facebook, then you know it’s time to LOG OFF and read a damn BOOK! And what better place to get one than the queerest book and art space in town, the Bureau of General Services Queer Division??? We’ll be living for performances by XZX, Teenage Strangler, Merrie Cherry, Kaioni, and Zoe Ligon at this hot ‘n’ literary event presented by Shane Shane. 9PM, $6 suggested.

**SHUGA** @ OLIVIA (1073 ATLANTIC AVE) Combining stellar interactive art, fashion, life, freedom, and deep sexy beats, this is a new monthly dance party for divas, growlers, howlers, and baby girls. Backed by the raw space of Olivia, the night features four amazing DJs: David John Sokolowski, Alex Moe, B3AR, and DJ Orange Krush. Manefestany Squirtz gives us showz, while Rify Royalty, Lorenzo Ashkenazi, and Vasso Vass are our resident gogo cubs. Come for world class drag performances, a go go boy auction off, Shuga deco, and a gear fashion show! Erotic as fuck. 9PM, $25, $20 with costume.
 

SATURDAY 6/7

BE CUTE @ ONE LAST SHAG (348 FRANKLIN AVE) Make your way to Clinton Hill for Horrorchata’s seriously cute monthly dance party. Chata’s alter ego Matty Beats and Merkin Muffley provide the night’s music. 10PM, FREE!

OVA THE RAINBOW @ THE SPECTRUM (59 MONTROSE AVE) TURNUP! Its not a color, but slutever, you know there will be serious LQQKS anyway! Beats by Brian Whatever, Bearcat and Joey Labeija, with a live performances by Quay Dash. 10PM, $5 BEFORE 1AM/$10 AFTER/$6 IF YOUR LQQK IS TURNT!


SUNDAY 6/8

TAROT SOCIETY @ BODY ACTUALIZED (143 TROUTMAN ST) Get a deeper look at your life from a beautiful spectrum of intuitive readers. Live music by Krissi Kathrin. 7PM, $5-$15 SLIDING SCALE.

LILITH FAIRY @ JOE’S PUB (425 LAFAYETTE ST) Come channel the 90s Lilith Fair Festival and invoke your inner-Sarah McLachlan (before the sad puppies) with these musical performance pieces presented by Enid Ellen. Part of the proceeds will be going to Act Up NYC to raise awareness for AIDS and HIV. 7PM, $14

MARINATE @ EASTERN BLOC (505 EAST 6TH STREET) DJ Dandylion always manages to turn the space he’s spinning at into a psychedelic portal of love and adventure. This Sunday marks the return of “Stacked Sundays” where Dandylion will be joined on the decks with talented mavericks of music W Jeremy and Christy Love. The gorgeous Rify Royalty and our very own BoyWolf will serve conceptual cosmic gogo all night long while trippy video by Mr Means plays on the screens. Last time we were there dancing till 4am with a sexy scruffy crowd. Lets tear the house down again this month! 9pm, FREE!


YOUR WEEKLY VIDEO - BOYWOLF’S “BLINDED BY THE DARK



Watch BOYWOLF’S debut music video, “Blinded By the Dark”. Directed by Gabe Gonzalez with music produced by JX Cannon, this is a psychedelic queer fantasy that will make you give yourself over to the animal within!
 


Art by Yonadav Greenwood

Copyright © 2014 The Culture Whore, All rights reserved.

THE COMEDOWN

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This weekend was, altogether, pretty wonderful.

Having sex in the middle of the day makes your whole day AMAZING, especially if it’s after brunch. Food + booze + sex = HELLO WORLD, WHAT’S GOOD? I honestly spent the whole Sunday with a smile on my face and dried cum on my stomach.

Spending an afternoon with 20 drag queens yelling at each other and chugging mimosas is the funnest ever. Yesterday was the promo shoot for this year’s Bushwig festival and it was so fun and inclusive and (mostly) shade-free. Everyone turned out serious looks, there was so much positive energy and queer camaraderie. I wish every day was like that.

I don’t understand why the G train exists. Is it only to torment it’s riders? Are all people who live off the G masochists? As a masochist myself, I need to tell them: slow down girls, you’re taking it a bit too far. No one likes pain and suffering that much.

Colin Self is brilliant. Clump on Friday night was pretty major, Bottoms blew my fucking mind once more. I so rarely get to see a show with that kind of punk energy. The first time shomeone shoved me while dancing I got so happy—and then I started shoving back.

Babysitting in mesh will always make the parents feel bad about their social lives. I have done this on three separate occasions now, so I feel like an expert at this point. I love it when the parents come home at 11pm yawning, ready for bed, and I’ve just woken up from a disco nap I started taking almost immediately after they left and I am ready to start my evening.

I had my hair braided by a young naval officer on Saturday, and now I really need The Culture Whore’s new intern to learn the process and make me beautiful every day. Well, more beautiful.

We’re living in a post-YAAAAAS world, my friends.

See you out there.

Mark, 6/2/14

THE COMEDOWN

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I realize that this is coming later than usual, but this was quite a fucking weekend. And yes, I am including Monday and Tuesday as part of the weekend. Yikes, I need another Tylenol.

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